


A Bleeding Heart

by Marius2045



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Family Fluff, Fluff, Loss, fond memories
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-27
Updated: 2015-04-27
Packaged: 2018-03-26 01:43:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3832423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marius2045/pseuds/Marius2045
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The water ran in small drops over the green leaves and pink flowers.  Rays of sunlight caught in them, causing tiny supernovas  to explode in them before they fell like dying stars to the ground.<br/>...</p>
<p>"You are always sad when you come here."</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Bleeding Heart

The water ran in small drops over the green leaves and pink flowers. Rays of sunlight caught in them, causing tiny supernovas to explode in them before they fell like dying stars to the ground.

Bilbo stared at them and his heart seemed to stop for a second. A deep sigh filled the air around him along with the rustling of his clothes when he stepped back until he hit the broad trunk of the tree. He let go of the watering can and touched, almost caressed the rough bark.

"You are always sad when you come here."

"What?" Bilbo awoke like from a deep slumber. His thoughts were miles away and it must have shown on his face.

Frodo walked around the great acorn tree until he could face the older Hobbit.

"The tree. The tree makes you sad, uncle Bilbo. Every time."

Frodo looked up at him for another short moment with his huge blue eyes before he sat down cross-legged at Bilbo's feet. He began pulling at the grass growing in the shadows of the trunk, staring at it without really noticing what he did. 

Bilbo almost froze on the spot. Another rush of air escaped his lunges and he looked up at the wild reign above his head, with its thick branches and rich green leaves. It made him feel sheltered and save. Like a pair of strong arms clad in iron and leather. Without noticing really, he relaxed.

Bilbo sat down slowly to not startle little Frodo. His heart was filled with an emotion he hadn't let himself feel for a very long time. Carefully, he put a hand on his unruly curls. Frodo kept staring at the grass to his feet, but Bilbo felt the stiffness creeping through the small Hobbit beneath the tips of his fingers.

"I am not sad", Bilbo started, but as soon as he said the words he knew they weren't true. And he knew that Frodo knew it, too.

How could he explain to a six year old about the journey he went on and how it ended in bonds and friendships with the most unlikely creatures? 

How should he explain that all of it was destroyed by fire and death and battles between orks and men and elves and dwarves?

How could he explain why a simple tree made his heart ache with losses he wished to have never endured? 

How should he put in words that and mostly why a part of his heart had died that day along with a king who never sat on the throne beneath the mountain?

Bilbo's eyes fell on the little pink flowers he had just watered. 

One day they just had started to grow and as the tree grew they grew, too, only in numbers. Thorin would have like them, he thought and his heart grew heavy again.

"Will you help me water them?" Bilbo knew that his voice sound awfully off, but he hoped that Frodo wouldn't notice. "I think I missed a few of them and we can't have that, Lad, don't we?"

Frodo finally looked at Bilbo again. For one so chatty he was awfully quiet all the time he sat next to him. But now a smile formed slowly on his face and he nodded.

With interest he turned his attention to the heart shaped flowers. He took one twig full of the pink blossoms in his chubby little fingers and one fell off, right into his palm. Frodo looked closer at it and was quiet for a long while. When he spoke, he sounded a bit unsettled.

"They look like a heart, but somehow they don't." He seemed to think about it again before he looked up at his uncle again. "They look sad... somehow broken?"

Bilbo heard the question in them, but found he couldn't answer. 

_'Bleeding, they are bleeding hearts, my dear Frodo.'_

A single tear ran down his cheek and he turned away quickly. Before he could wipe it away or even remotely gain control over his own, bleeding heart, Bilbo felt himself being hugged. The sob he tried to keep down turned into a strangled noise when Frodo hugged him even tighter, not knowing that a neck was a delicate thing and handled carefully.

"I am so sorry, Uncle, don't be sad. I am here, love you, Uncle Bilbo!"

Frodo jumped on him, squirming and turning around until he properly sat in his lap, never stopping with hugging him, pushing his own now tear-stricken face into the curve of Bilbo's neck.

Warmth spread through his entire body, but now that he was able to breathe again, it chased the cold away, which tried to drown him with sorrow still close to his heart. 

Love and fondness for the little fellow chased even the last dark memory away, if only for a while and he couldn't help himself from hugging Frodo back as tightly as he dared.  
One day, he decided right then, he would tell him everything. Or maybe he'd write a book so Frodo could read it, when he was gone.

Gone back, to see the mountains again, standing tall and strong under the same stars of old. 

To visit Dale and see it being rebuilt within all its glory by the new Lord, the man they call the dragon slayer. 

To Erebor, where the dwarves had come home to with his help, not sure if he could ever set foot inside the halls filled with gold and glory again.

Back to see Fili and Kili and the King under the mountain. His friends, brothers in arms and all that he held dear, knowing all of the good and bad memories would come back when he'd meet them again.

Bilbo thought that he would take some on the long journey and lay them down on their graves. That maybe, when they dry out, his heart would stop bleeding, too.

**Author's Note:**

> Not a native english speaking person. No beta, only spell-check, but I will get there later on...


End file.
